Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Psalm




Hear my plea O Lord!

Look and see the helpless speck
that is I,
on my knees,
with the same ugly words
on the tip of my dry tongue
hiding behind parched lips.

I THIRST!

Quench my heart's lust for this world!
Satiate this hunger that burns as

Gehenna yells.


Lost are my promises to you...

Gone
are my hopes of self-preservation.

No.

It is You.


"I am undone..."

I echo...
(you are still)

I run...
(you are still)

I fall...
(...you are still...)

...I tremble
(You are still!!!!)

I CURSE YOU!!!!



You are still.

I am still.

We are...


Related.

Related as related gets.

Related in the sense that
blood doesn't mean a thing.



(Unless it is shed.)



Related in the sense that You are in my head.

(How can I escape?)

Related in the sense that You made
these bones,
this mind,
these hands,
this
HEART...

SO BREAK 'EM!!!
They're "Yours"...RIGHT?!?!

(You always wait for the fun part of the roller coaster to make me nauseous...)



You know...

Cain was related to Abel.

And..haha...we all saw how that went down.

Cause You told us!

Someone actually obeyed you.

And You..."...did him a favor..."?


Heaven
must have been kinda lonely for Abel.
Seeing as how he was numero

uno...

Quiet bus ride home.

(plenty of seats though)

And Cain...
wow.

Banishment.

So what's Your point?

I don't know if I'm ready to let go.

You know?

I CAN'T EVEN SEE YOU!!

(anymore)

I talk and I talk
to somehow get a clue of how much

You really love me.

And...

yeah...

The only
(quiet)
One
is
You.

HOW LONG?!?!

How long am I to be tempted?
How long am I to concede?

And
(excuse me for asking)
but just
How much more can You take of my fake tears?!

Don't You get it?!

I'M JUST A PHONY!!!

(just between you and me...if half of these people knew what lurked underneath this pretty shirt...they'd hate me for it...)

I'm in way too deep now.

You're...

I'm...

It's...

too late.

The only consistent thing about me
is my lying.

(haha)

My inconsistency.

"It was my fault."
"It was my bad."
"I'm sorry."

YOU WANNA WIPE ME CLEAN?!?!

just wipe me out...

But...

"Enough about me..."

(he said)

So what about You?

You.

You are light.
Surrounded by darkness yet,
knows it not.

You are the moon.
Night's stranger.
You are the author
of me.

Of them.

Of stars that sing to me.
Of breeze that comforts me.
Of wind that causes me to shiver...
and of flame that warms me...

so that I may shiver again...

You're the glance she gives me
whenever we pass one another.
You're that feeling I get when she laughs at me.

Ha.

When she laughs.

The way she walks is nothing short of grace.

Agghh...
and the way her hair gets stuck to my lips...

and...and her hair...

eyes...

But You know all of this.

You know me better than I think I don't.

So...
what do I need?

Well...
Want is obvious.

That's Peace.

I mean...
I just want for once to be able to stand s....

oh...

still...




I'm tired.

I'm tired of running.
Tired of falling.
Tired of running so far
only to fall so hard
to find that it was the ground
not the yellow tape that broke...

my fall.

(Cycles are resiliant.)

But what about thier elements?


I need bigger lungs.

Remember?

I fall alot.

and...mostly cause I'm tired.

" (Cycles are resiliant.) "

And...

I wanna be still.

YOU TELL ME TO BE STILL!!!

But...

It's funny...

Everytime I fall...

I don't know why...

But...



I want nothing more than to run again.



So...

Is it tact?

...(are we back to that again?)

I know I know...

"Cycles, Resilliant..."



Good Providence






2 comments:

Anonymous said...

WOW....WOW!!!! All i can say is......WOW!!!

Anonymous said...

Pretty good!!